I created this site as for a while now I've wanted to do something about being the Scapegoat. I went through 20+ years of HELL as family Scapegoat. It's left me with PTSD, which obviously really sucks. Now that my NM has died I'm able to set the record straight with those I know. Some suspected my Mum wasn't 'all together there'/had lost the plot. Most had no clue what so ever. But my Dad and I both struggled to deal with Mum on a daily basis. Dad did say to me that, "she wasn't like this when I married her" (exact quote). Everthing, as it always does with narcissists, happened behind closed doors. When others were around Mum would seem all 'normal'. Sadly that was just an act on her part. Due to disabilities and lack of cash flow I was unable to move out. So I saw/experienced EVERYTHING. Over 20 years of Mum, Dad and me. Parent's both died in 2016. Early in 2018 I had online therapy with a licenced Counsellor and early on she said I have PTSD due to emotional abuse from my Mum.I wouldn't wish being a Scapegoat/having PTSD on anyone, it's HELL.
To those who don't really believe this can be going on - It goes on more than you know. Through joining multiple sites that cover narcissism and chatting with others, who are sadly still in this situation, there are MANY (especially daughters of NM's) that are in HELL on Earth every day.
Most do, as I did for many years, think about suicide as the only way out. I contemplated suicide every night for a good 10 years. It's just thought of my cat Buffy (who died in Aug. 2019) & bestie that prevented me from actually doing it. But I knew how I would do it all that time. It's partly why I now have a 'Semicolon' stick n poke style tattoo (that I did myself) on my left arm.
The Son/Daughter of a narcissistic parent.
The Boyfriend/Girlfriend of a narcissistic partner.
Struggling with the aftermath of a narcissist relationship.
The Scapegoat (SG) in a narcissistic family environment.
Suffering mentally due to being the Scapegoat.
Still going through the narcissistic abuse.
Just figuring out that this toxic situation is your life.
Interested in Reiki healing.
Stressed beyond belief.
Suicidal/have suicidal thoughts.
Trying to learn the 'Narcissistic Lingo'.
NM=Narcissistic Mother - This IS the WORST type. As they were pregnant with you. They gave birth to you. You should be able to love/respect/care for your Mother more than anyone else.
**I know from personal experience as to also what it's like when the NM dies. The constant/lifelong emotional wreck you normally become. Due to so many bad/conflicting emotions that come up in the aftermath of the death. Such as: anger/emotionally numb/feel nothing at all/relief/happiness that abuse is over etc... It's partly why I created this site. As others are going through this abuse too.**
**I know from personal experience, this IS HELL on Earth. We need healing/therapy/understanding from others. We've been emotionally and mentally abused, often for many years. Others may not even know what really goes on behind closed doors. Everything is done 'behind closed doors' and the narcissist just puts on an act. Sadly most people fall for the act, as it's so convincing.**
GC=Golden Child - Parent's 'Saint'/'Prince'/narcissist in training. They may not even be aware they're the GC.
Roles=The roles within the family are setup by the main narcissist. They decide who's the SG and who's the GC. The SG is usually an empath (I'm like that), the truth teller (I HATE/DESPISE BULLSHIT, maybe partly cause I'm a Scorpio and we can detect BS just so easily) etc... Were NOT happy with 'abuse and crap' going on and making out to everyone else that everything is fine and dandy.
EM=Enabler Mother - They know what's going on is wrong but don't do anything to stop it.
ED=Enabler Dad - They know what's going on is wrong but don't do anything to stop it.
My Facebook Nametests Result:
I'm Rev. Reiki Grand Master Lynda Ward. I've (19-01-2019) created a Reiki Healing Bank which is as follows:
This Healing Bank is an ethereal, limitless storage bank. Where I deposit healings as required. Recipient's withdraw these healings when needed, by saying a particular phrase (which I'll let you know) with intent to receive the healing in full.
The healings result in: all appropriate Spirit Guides, Archangels, Ascended Masters, passed on loved ones and Deities coming together to alleviate your mental pain, your stress and to save your sanity. To help you endure and survive life with a narcissist and to assist in your healing.
My Reiki based email is: email@example.com
I work on a 'Donation Basis'. Instead of charging a fixed fee, YOU pay what YOU THINK HEALING IS WORTH. When donating, (VITAL) mention in note to me that it's for 'REIKI 4 SCAPEGOAT'. I will let you know via email, when your Reiki healing is ready. You'll receive 3 seperate healings, each with a duration of 10 minutes to receive.
MY DONATION LINK.